Fully stocked kitchen includes macrowave, defrigerator, ice cream destroyer, self-cutting oven, crawl-in freezer, and tile flooring (floor is just one large tile). Fully looted living room no longer includes couches, love seats, coffee table, flower vases, or rug. Restrooms furnished with beds (that makes more sense, right? I mean as far as names for rooms go).

Each room comes equipped with at least one window which can be peered through when musing on thoughts unrelated to present tasks. Water and electricity included in rent, complimentary heating provided by 1,989,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 kg accretion of fused and fusing hydrogen conveniently located in center of solar system. First month's rent free, but by god you damn well better pay up for the next eleven — if you know what's good for you.

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